2:19 PM are you available for 30 minutes starting now?
me: yes sir
Tao: i'm giong to the bathroom first
me: 'take ur time'
2:26 PM Tao: hi
Tao: are you ready, is now good for you?
2:27 PM I am eating a bag of jolly ranchers
Tao: ok good
me: I feel chill
Tao: where is your mom
is she standing behind you
me: no she is vacuuming our staircase
Tao: oh, good
me: it smells like american apparel
Tao: did your mom tell you she was bidding
Tao: what did you say
me: I said 'good', 'I should tweet this'
2:28 PM Tao: sweet
does your mom read my blog every day
me: she says she didn't know you had a blog
she must have found it on twitter then
does she have a twitter
me: she is more 'into hipster runoff'
2:29 PM Tao: how does she read people's twitters, thru some kind of feed?
damn, does your mom think carles is tao lin at all
me: yes she has a twitter (quantumgrl)
she doesn't think you are carles whatsoever
2:30 PM how did you find hipster runoff?
Tao: what did you google
me: oh COME ON
this is humiliating
Tao: we can talk about something else
me: I obviously googled 'hipster' because I was fourteen and trying to secure an identity
Tao: are you going to college?
2:31 PM what college does your mom want you to go to?
me: wherever I can get in, I suppose
I don't have good grades
Tao: your mom has a 3-1 follower to following ratio, seems sweet
what did your mom say to talk to me about
your mom censored herself in a tweet: 'BebeZeva You are totally making sh** up.'
2:32 PM me: haha she just said to be engaging and 'control the convestation'
I told her to type the whole thing out
Tao: how does she feel about all the 'f words' in 'sfaa,' didn't she buy you that
me: she's not that conservative
Tao: do you feel like you are controlling the conversation at all
me: no, but I like the way this is going
2:33 PM Tao: why does your mom type 'Bebezeva' instead of '@bebezeva,' have you told her about that
me: I feel like I'm typing in a monotone
she used to @ me all the time
and I told her not to so no one would find me
what is your mom's favorite movie
2:34 PM or a movie she likes
me: she also like Quentin Terentino movies
did you see 'where the wild things are'
me: Of course not
I hated the book
Tao: damn, why not
me: the book was boring
did you see 'being john malkovich'
me: people only want to see it because urban outfitters sells WTWTA shirts
2:35 PM me: no I haven't but my mom keeps telling me she'll get it off netflix and never does
Tao: you once tweeted you were writing 2x poem in the 'muumuu house' style, what happened
me: I did write them but I was afraid they weren't good enough so I never showed them to anybody
Tao: what were they about?
2:36 PM me: the first one was too metaphorical
I think muumuu house is about simplicity
me: it was about walking around in the morning and not usually every being awake in the morning to go walking around
it sounds good
2:37 PM i see you recently started to follow 'brandon scott gorrell,' what caused you to do that, on twitter
me: I think you @ed him
and I recognized him
Tao: i see
me: I think I've read his tumblr before
2:38 PM Tao: you once tweeted you would review 'sfaa' on amazon, do you think that will still happen
do you have a sister?
me: I am very easily 'overwhelmed' so its hard for me to do things on time
yes her name is Rachel but I call her Ham
Tao: how old is she
me: she is @RachelZehava and she is seventeen
Tao: 'ham,' sounds derogatory
2:39 PM does it ever 'come up' in conversation how you are way more famous than her on the internet, how does she feel
she doesn't care whatsoever
2:40 PM her ambitions in life are very different from mine
Tao: have you received 'offers' after your modeling re 'i am carles'
what are your ambitions in life?
me: I think my ambitions involve 'proving a lot of people wrong'
and being 'extremely relevant' and 'well known'
me: nothing realistic
Tao: don't you 'need' a tumblr or something to help you in that
2:41 PM or have you already planned that
me: I feel like I am very verbose and tumblr would limit me
so I made a wordpress but was too intimidated by it to post anything
Tao: damn, wordpress
have you considered blogger
2:42 PM me: yes but I couldn't stand the format
Tao: do you plan to use this gchat to 'leverage' yoru career
Tao: by posting it somewhere for 'mad hits'
'but where would you post it'
2:43 PM me: not sure, maybe it would be my first wordpress post
Tao: that would be sweet
maybe you could do that
me: me and my mom were talking about that an hour ago
what was said about that
2:44 PM me: she didn't really know who either of them were, but she saw that you RT'd it and recognized that it was 'relevant'
has she ever said negative things about me
you can be honest
me: she is surprisingly 'defensive' of you and carles
Tao: oh, sweet
2:45 PM does she ever comment on blogs
she has never tweeted @ me
me: haha she reads her brother's blog
Tao: what is her brother's blog
me: its a sarcastic humor blog
about 'mainstream things'
Tao: sounds good
how many hits does it get a day
2:46 PM me: I have no idea, actually
I think he is on wordpress, too
its not a big deal
Tao: wordpress seems 'unseemly' to me
what did you eat today
2:47 PM and whole foods popcorn
Tao: i ate oatmeal last night w my gf
me: and jolly ranchers
do you eat it together
me: is that romantic
Tao: we ate 3 packets
Tao: i think so, maybe
me: what is the most romantic flavor of oatmeal
Tao: i could've eaten many more packets
what do you think
2:48 PM me: something amorous like with cinnamon in it
Tao: we had cinnomon last night
me: I think I am really into 'fruit and cream'
seems really adolescent, possibly
Tao: would you rather have a lifetime supply of wendy's spicy chicken sandwich or mcdonald's chicken nuggets
me: wendy's spicy chicken sandwiches
2:49 PM Tao: me too
seems like i could just eat the lettuce if i wanted to be healthy
whereas with the nuggets i wouldn't be able to do that
me: they would get 'srsly old'
sandwiches have more variety
Tao: what is your main method going to be, do you think, of becoming 'well known'
2:50 PM me: I am unsure, for my entire life I have wanted to be a writer
I have always utilized that skill
but now I feel like I am distancing myself from writing
even though i don't want to
is there something 'filling' the space where writing used to be
me: yes, my place in the 'hipster runoff brand'
2:51 PM Tao: i see
(A small portion of this chat has been omitted for privacy purposes)
Tao: oh, damn
what do you make of that chart
2:52 PM wait, this chart is more interesting
Tao: seems like she should be more famous than that
2:53 PM i seem stagnant
Tao: seems not good
do you hve any questions
me: you seem extremely dependent on charts
2:54 PM i don't know how else to judge how my career is going
charts seem assuring
our time is almost over
are there things you want to talk about
me: I don't think so
I am glad we talked about muumuu house
Tao: oh, good
2:55 PM are there more things you want to talk about re muumuu house
me: I think I just needed some assurance
that you were interested in anything I have to write
I feel like my future depends on it, possibly
me: do you turn down a lot of people
2:56 PM the submission policy says that there aren't submissions
that i'll ask people to submit if i feel confident they'll be able to
write something that muumuu house would be interested in publishing
where is your mom right now
2:57 PM me: I hope you will be interested
she is downstairs
Tao: thank you and her for participating in the ebay gchat thing
i hope this chat has been okay with you
i encourage you to use it to promote your career, if you post it somewhere i'll link it
2:58 PM me: that would be 'greatly appreciated'
hope we keep in touch
have a nice night
it was nice chatting
me: yes it was
enjoy your oatmeal
me: 'good night'