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YESTERDAY I WAS HEAVILY DEPRESSED
you emailed me the next morning
saying you guess you missed me
i walked to my hostel with a seriously worried expression on my face
and a slight idea of sarcasm
and sat in white, plastic chair
only to make a sandwhich later
sensing the negativity of loneliness
and the fact that tomorrow would be different
and that something was bad, in general
THINKING I COULD JUST BE HAPPY IF I WERE HIT BY A CAR
and fighting off existential worries
i want to speak spanish in front of you
or push my face into your cheekbone
i want to say something about your nipples
something about unexpectedly spiraling into a kind of sarcastic depression
on an uneventful friday morning
watching south park until i fall asleep
or the bleakness of the temperature outside
the way the sunlight filters through the blinds
i feel really worried
THE BLEAKNESS OF STANDING IN AN EMPTY KITCHEN
imagining my face lit by a sunset that's almost over
and walking into the living room
trying to logically convince myself of something
i miss you so much
the same way the temperature makes me feel afraid
your gmail status makes me worried about the future
in a giant house with central heating
in a giant bed
eating chocolate
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