2:39PM Mar 14
lay in bed for a long time, 'twittering' in my head. tried to remember what i had 'twittered' last night. got up. put on dressing gown. etc.

2:50AM Mar 14
listened to man on radio in taxi with 'strong opinion'. panicked mildly that i would never have a 'strong opinion' about anything.

10:53AM Mar 16
possibly going to eat a banana in a moment.

11:00AM Mar 16
still haven't eaten the banana. what am i doing?

11:01AM Mar 16
i feel like i have 'twittered' myself into eating the banana.

1:41PM Mar 16
i feel like i am 'twittering the mother-fucking shit out of everything' today. i feel like i am in a fast, open-top sports car.

2:22AM Mar 16
my penis feels like a day old glass of water, with bubbles and a bit of tobacco in it.

2:22AM Mar 16
my penis feels like a CD i never listen to anymore.

2:23AM Mar 16
my penis feels like a curious old gentleman climbing a flight of stairs and then stopping halfway up to have a stroke.

1:47PM Mar 17
i am eating a blueberry muffin.

11:57AM Mar 18
it is 'blueberry muffin time' again.

4:13PM Mar 18
my leg feels strange.

4:15PM Mar 18
@jennashworth hi, babes.

2:19PM Mar 20
just watched a video on the internet explaining how to fold a t-shirt.

2:22PM Mar 20
just tried to look at the alley at the back of my parent's house in kenilworth on google street view. wasn't there.