in my head i just sang 'damn i don't want to shower' to the tune of 'man i feel like a woman'

my dad came downstairs, filled a coffee mug with water, put a spoon in it, left it on the counter, mumbled something, and went back upstairs

a ~16" poop just 'flew' out of me at a speed of ~8mph. when i flushed it left 'without a trace.' seemed mysterious, yet businesslike

just read 'performing arts center' as if it were 'performing [sex act]' with 'arts center' being a sex act

looked at a pizza boli's menu for about 90 seconds

looked at statcounter 'greedily' while thinking 'power' and making my eyes get big. want to scream 'POWER'

seems like i'm never not going to first read 'Virginia' as 'Vagina'...

seems...hard...to care about anything...lol...

thought about a world where pokemon accompany you in the shower and wash your body/hair as you stand with your eyes closed

have been 'stalking' high school acquaintance who seems to be actively suffering from 'post wedding depression,' via facebook status updates

drank a coke. four minutes passed. life is still bleak!

going to nap and take 3 vicodin before public speaking class

currently enjoying the smell of my crotch

something about the way the light looks right now reminds me of being on a curb next to a maybe gay kid at a birthday party in high school

argued for an hour on the telephone. now looking at pictures of carbs

just read 'are you a bot? or just a macro spamming me' on google search results and felt nostalgic in a surprising way

WHOA I'M SO DEPRESSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

woke from ~2 hour nap 2 hours ago. now apartment is dark. smells like pasta and cooked meat outside. seems like i might die soon


parking attendant guy just said 'how are you big boss?' to my mom while i openly picked my nose

have 'consoled myself' ~3 times this week by thinking 'everyone in the world will die someday. i will die someday'