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THE SUPER GENIUS BAR
My girlfriend reminds me of the girl I am cheating on her with. The girl I am cheating on her with is a genius. I know this because of context clues—she's employed at the Apple Store Genius Bar. She fixes the phone screens but she doesn't do it that well. Sometimes they pop out of place and I like that. It's cute. She's just like my girlfriend if my girlfriend was a genius and more attractive. It doesn't matter anyway. You can't get close to any of us. Not to me—the narrator—my commonplace girlfriend, or my genius paramour, because there's nothing left in any of us except for our lymphatic and vascular systems. We're just nodes and wires. If you want to get close to us, you have to take us to the super genius bar. That's the one God works at. It's called Heaven. He can fix us up real nice with a new screen and you can even buy the nonsecular airpods. Music sounds a lot better on those.
FLIGHT SCHOOL
My boyfriend came into my life out of nowhere, at the worst time imaginable, but also the best time, the perfect time, the only time he could have, which is a non-sentence, I just said absolutely nothing at all, and this is how my thoughts metastasize when I look at him. I have this fantasy, where he buys me a super short skirt and I put it on and he asks me to twirl for him. I also fantasize that he asks me to jump, I ask how high baby, he says as high as you can baby, I jump, he says you can jump higher than that baby, he's right of course, so now I'm jumping higher than I ever have before, I ask how's this baby, he says that's good baby but you can do even better I know you can, and I know he's right so at this point I figure out flying, but it's nothing, it's no big deal at all.
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